LISTEN: Final 49ers 7-Round Mock Draft With Steph Sanchez →

There are 212 users in the forums

New Theory as to the Niners struggles

Shop Find 49ers gear online
Originally posted by cNiner:
Can u share what you are smoking ?

sharing is caring
Originally posted by cciowa:
jennings looks like he could be someones henchman

The real question is....is he the puppet or the puppet master? (que mind blowing)
I think I just pooped a little.
Single bullet theory.
damn why did I click this thread
Originally posted by Afrikan:
damn why did I click this thread

Youre a better person because of it. Youre welcome.
Why is dis s**t not locked yet doe?

There are some head scratching threads being allowed here recently....
Nice
Originally posted by OX49er253:
I have a new theory on the Niners "Troubles." I think we have a conspiracy on our hands, one that runs deep and into dark places. I have spent countless hours researching this, I have confirmed my suspicions with multiple insider sources and now I am going to shed light on to this awful truth. Besides for the obvious Illuminati Elements involved, I believe the Niners are playing possum with the league and have made a bold attempt to save money and possibly the franchise.

It starts with Kaep, of course it has to start with him. The front office knows that if Kaep continues to have a breakout year he will be paid in the $100 Million dollar range. They also know the secret to their success is that they have been able to spend money elsewhere on other positions as opposed to their QB. They have been able to build one of the most talented and deep teams because of this. They look at the Ravens and Falcons dropping all their cash on their QB's and their terrible struggles and decided this would not be them. Roman and Harbaugh knew after Kaep's 400 yard performance in Green Bay that if they let unleashed Kaep to his full potential the cost of signing him would be so astronomical it would blow up the team.

So they began to purposefully handcuff and handicap him with questionable play calls and personnel packages. They will continue to do this to him until the day he signs a much more team friendly deal. But I hear what you're saying, you're saying "Bro one guy due up for a big contract playing poorly a conspiracy does not make!" Don't you worry you're pretty little head random internet person. It runs deeper.

Lets look at who else is up for contracts...big contracts. Crabtree, did that achilles injury really happen by freak accident like we are led to believe? Aldon Smith...WHO WAS FEEDING HIM THE SHOTS! WHO CALLED THE POLICE ON HIM! I wouldn't be shocked if good ole Baalke was hiding behind that tree as an innocent Aldon tried to get away from his car.

Ok, ok, ok so sure it's weird that the 3 biggest guys up for a contract next year have all either played badly, been injured, or developed an addiction. But what about the 4th guy? Oh you mean Mike Iupati? Our stud LG also due for a big pay day next year? Yeah he just "sprained" his MCL last game, this was no doubt a subtle threat of what would happen if he didn't get in line and take an affordable contract. I'm on to the Harbaugh/Baalke/Illuminati reign of terror, and don't be surprised if all the guys listed above take team friendly deals well below their market value. We believe in a team full of dark manipulating individuals whose sole purpose is win as many championships as possible....BY. ANY. MEANS. NECESSARY.

Just remember though folks like Bud Light always tells us...It's only weird if it doesn't work.

P.S. I am pretty sure Brian Jennings is the actual hand doling out the mighty Harbaugh justice. They cut him so he could better work in the shadows to help the team. Fear the Centaur.

I think you may be visiting way to many conspiracy theory sites.....

Guys I've been having fun messing with you all. But come on I wrote this tongue and cheek. I really felt like that I made that pretty obvious. Have some fun with it.
Originally posted by OX49er253:
Guys I've been having fun messing with you all. But come on I wrote this tongue and cheek. I really felt like that I made that pretty obvious. Have some fun with it.

I understand this, it was either that or you truly are delusional, but its a horrible thread none the less...

Post this kinda stuff in the parking lot.
[ Edited by IdahoNiner on Nov 20, 2013 at 7:32 PM ]
Eh sometimes we need to take a break from the ridiculousness of fandom. There are only so many Fire Roman, bring back Alex Smith, and the sky is falling threads I can handle in a day. Besides you have to admit its kinda of weird and in a twisted way funny that our top guys up for contract have all had oddities happen to them this season. Just go with it baby, it'll feel good, I'll be gentle.
@ this entire thread.
Reread the original post or slam my penis in a door? Hmm? Both excruciatingly painful? Hello door!
Share 49ersWebzone