The Niners are in trouble; over half the fan base has given up on their once beloved (sorta) Quarterback. And to top it all off, I am still….
NO, I AIN'T! Two rounds of antibiotics, all sorts of weird concoctions, Chinese food, lots of sleep, lots of Metal Gear Solid V, Metal Gear Online, Star Wars Battlefront, and PGA Tour. And since, I am back to 75% full f**king Fropwns fantastic fun-filled f**king awesomeness, it is time to do what I do better than anybody on the webzone. Better than anybody in the nation. Hell, better than anybody on the globe.
Waste your time.
HIT IT!
Errr wait, we are on the road. So, we ain't wearing black. f**k.
1. Describe the Niners so far in this game:
What Arnie said. "Let's party!" I think the Niners are like a lot of you dudes/dudettes late on Saturday/Early Sunday morning....you see her/him. She/he sees you. It is late and all the grade "A" opportunities have long since caught the train to the coast. That's right. She/he is your last chance to score. Yup, you folks are in full on "f**k it mode".
It may not be pretty. They sure as hell ain't pretty, but.....
You are going to score! AMIRITE? Go on and get your funk on! Because that is what the Niners are doing right now in a 6-13 UGLYASS game. They are desperate to score! And god love them if they get a touchdown!
2. Should you bail on Colin Kaepernick?
Here is his line so far tonight: 12-17, 118 in the air; 3 for 23 yards on the ground. Folks, love him, hate him, he is all of our offense, again. Don't look now, but he is starting to come to life (THANK f**kING GOD).
3. As I watch our defense start to come alive (TARTT DOOT?!?!?! Oh, whew..PUNT!), I keep thinking that we need some sort of explosive POSITIVE (PLEASE FOOTBALL GODS?!?!?!) offensive plays.
But will they come?
BOLDIN! WITH TOUCH! UGLY TOUCH! BUT TOUCH!
f**kin...Vance McDonald
HYDE!
BUSH!.....hehe
HAYNE? HE DOES MORE THAN FAIR CATCH PUNTS?! DA FUQ?
A REDZONE TD BY KAEPERNICK? IN THE AIR? DA FUQ??!?!?!?!?! TO THE HATERS, I SAY (CENSORED) FILTHY MONKEY (CENSORED). TRANSLATION: I LOVE YOU! KEEP BAGGIN' ON THE KID! GO ON AND HATE SOME MORE! s**t KEEPS HIM WARM AT NIGHT!
BOLDIN, AFTER A POTATO T.O. CALL, BUT s**t, HE CAUGHT IT FOR A BIG THIRD DOWN CONVERSION!
CELEK ON A KEY THIRD DOWN!
KAP THREW IT DEEP AND GOT A P.I. CALL!
HYDE!!!!!
CELEK TOUCHDOWN! A SECOND RED ZONE PASSING TD FROM KAEPERNICK?!?!??!!? DA FUQ!!??!?!?!?!?!!! HATE ON!
T. SMITH!!!
BOLDIN!!! AGAIN WITH TOUCH!!
HYDE!!! BEAT UP BUT STILL GOING!
HYDE! UP THE f**kING GUT!!!
HOLDING IN THE END ZONE!
CELEK and KAP!
HYDE!!!!! GROUND AND POUND TD!!!! 4th QTR TD!!!
LYNCH!!
4. Moments of inconsistency kill us.
- Boone hold
- Hyde drop
- Defensive breakdowns
- Damnit, I love you Kap but a T.O. there. Yeah, yeah the clock thing. Okay, but s**t, doot. Your haters are going to kill you for that.
- HATE THE FADE TO THE RIGHT SIDE OF THE END ZONE!
- PI on Acker
- Miller?
- O line breaking down on the final drive
5. Final thoughts:
Ugh. I need a second to compress.
1-4 Eli Manning is turning into idiot-savant Eli Manning (I'm calling it now, they beat the Cardinals to go to the Super Bowl against the Patriots.) This was clearly a game we should have won. Defense broke down. Eli, well, he does what idiot-savant Eli does: wins.Final stat line for Kaepernick: 23/35, 262 2 TDS (Both in the redzone); tons of big third down throws; 3/23 on the ground. Hyde had a good game. Boldin too.
Sadly, I have a handful of explosion pics from Commando. But I just do not have the heart to post them. The bottom line is this. Kaepernick played well enough and did what he could. I hope those of you willing to "#SuckforGoff (5ints)" or that want to bench Kap for Gabbert will give the kid his due. He is a young QB with a heckuva lot of talent. Give him a chance. Rebuild the O-line, find a replacement for Boldin (White?), get rid of VD (Seriously, I love VD, but he is Jamba Juice stand away from retiring; I'll take my chances with Celek.), get Hayne more involved on the short yardage passing game, cut Bush (AB, some help?), and maybe get some help on D, and I think we will return to contention quickly. But just not this year.
FINAL, FINAL THOUGHT: These are the seasons you will tell your kids about when Kaep hoists up our sixth title. You just got to believe they will get back there and finish the job.
I am Fropwns
[ Edited by fropwns on Oct 12, 2015 at 5:39 PM ]
