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New Theory as to the Niners struggles

Are things so bad that there's no point in actually posting football analysis anymore? I'm not going there. We can salvage this.
Ok Steven Seagal!!
I love this thread
  • Silky
  • Veteran
  • Posts: 10,978
I wonder if Harbaugh made an account here if he would be promoted to moderator right away
Originally posted by ApatheticIAm:
I wonder if Harbaugh made an account here if he would be promoted to moderator right away

Is that your theory??
  • mayo49
  • Veteran
  • Posts: 37,061
We need to get back to the read-option. Kap was a monster running it and no one could stop it.
Originally posted by IdahoNiner:
Originally posted by OX49er253:
Guys I've been having fun messing with you all. But come on I wrote this tongue and cheek. I really felt like that I made that pretty obvious. Have some fun with it.

I understand this, it was either that or you truly are delusional, but its a horrible thread none the less...

Post this kinda stuff in the parking lot.

you guys take this forum to seriously...get a sense of humor
Originally posted by mayo49:
We need to get back to the read-option. Kap was a monster running it and no one could stop it.
I think we need to hire Paul Johnson and run the Triple Option. That way we can get Kaep hurt, lower his price tag and go back to running a big boy offense.
I stopped at 'Kaep'.
Originally posted by NinerGod:
I stopped at 'Kaep'.

Then you missed out on glory my friend. You missed out on glory.

Originally posted by OX49er253:
I have a new theory on the Niners "Troubles." I think we have a conspiracy on our hands, one that runs deep and into dark places. I have spent countless hours researching this, I have confirmed my suspicions with multiple insider sources and now I am going to shed light on to this awful truth. Besides for the obvious Illuminati Elements involved, I believe the Niners are playing possum with the league and have made a bold attempt to save money and possibly the franchise.

It starts with Kaep, of course it has to start with him. The front office knows that if Kaep continues to have a breakout year he will be paid in the $100 Million dollar range. They also know the secret to their success is that they have been able to spend money elsewhere on other positions as opposed to their QB. They have been able to build one of the most talented and deep teams because of this. They look at the Ravens and Falcons dropping all their cash on their QB's and their terrible struggles and decided this would not be them. Roman and Harbaugh knew after Kaep's 400 yard performance in Green Bay that if they let unleashed Kaep to his full potential the cost of signing him would be so astronomical it would blow up the team.

So they began to purposefully handcuff and handicap him with questionable play calls and personnel packages. They will continue to do this to him until the day he signs a much more team friendly deal. But I hear what you're saying, you're saying "Bro one guy due up for a big contract playing poorly a conspiracy does not make!" Don't you worry you're pretty little head random internet person. It runs deeper.

Lets look at who else is up for contracts...big contracts. Crabtree, did that achilles injury really happen by freak accident like we are led to believe? Aldon Smith...WHO WAS FEEDING HIM THE SHOTS! WHO CALLED THE POLICE ON HIM! I wouldn't be shocked if good ole Baalke was hiding behind that tree as an innocent Aldon tried to get away from his car.

Ok, ok, ok so sure it's weird that the 3 biggest guys up for a contract next year have all either played badly, been injured, or developed an addiction. But what about the 4th guy? Oh you mean Mike Iupati? Our stud LG also due for a big pay day next year? Yeah he just "sprained" his MCL last game, this was no doubt a subtle threat of what would happen if he didn't get in line and take an affordable contract. I'm on to the Harbaugh/Baalke/Illuminati reign of terror, and don't be surprised if all the guys listed above take team friendly deals well below their market value. We believe in a team full of dark manipulating individuals whose sole purpose is win as many championships as possible....BY. ANY. MEANS. NECESSARY.

Just remember though folks like Bud Light always tells us...It's only weird if it doesn't work.

P.S. I am pretty sure Brian Jennings is the actual hand doling out the mighty Harbaugh justice. They cut him so he could better work in the shadows to help the team. Fear the Centaur.
Last year we had more options in the passing game , Moss, Crabtree, Davis, Manningham and Walker were all targets Kaep trusted throwing to ....

pretty difficult to move the ball when Kaep has only two targets he has faith in ....Baldwin and McDonald need to step it up and provide Kaep with more options, and With Mario and Crabs coming back, hopefully Kaep can get into a groove with his targets , which will make our running game more effective, because nobody respects our passing game at the moment......

I'd like to see LMJ as a slot receiver, he's a playmaker and we need to get the ball in his hands more to help the offense get it going
Sabotaging themselves to save money? Save the conspiracy theories for something that may actually be plausible.

P.S. The Matrix is just a movie. It's not real.
This is true and Big foot is real and so is the tooth Fairy.
you think elvis is alive to? you sound like that marvin guy on here
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